I feel like Rapunzel sitting in her ivory tower looking down on the world below with longing. Of course, it's not quite the same. I am not a beautiful princess, and my prince charming is stuck in the tower with me. My tower is hardly ivory. It's a one-story red brick. Every morning, as I sit at my desk and look out the window in front of me, I see a world that is so familiar, but so drastically different.
I could always tell time by the activity on the street. At 7:30, my neighbor always drove by on his way to work, slowing down just enough to see what was new in my flower bed. That was my signal to get my second cup of coffee. After that, kids started filtering down the street to catch the bus chatting and laughing and so full of life. The little brown dog with fuzzy ears and a wiggly tail always followed his boy. When the dog came back home alone and turned into the cul-de-sac beside me, I knew the bus had come and gone. I needed to stop daydreaming and get back to work.
At ten, my neighbor left for her daily yoga class. I knew it was time to stop writing, come out of my office, and do a little housework, I needed to figure out what we would do for dinner and check on my hubby. Later, when I heard the laughter of kids filtering down the street, I knew it was 3:45. The little brown dog had been waiting at the corner for his boy, and ran in circles yapping with joy. It was time to check my email and doing a little more writing till I saw my neighbor come home from work at 4:45.
Two young women from down the street jogged around the neighbor circle several times reminding me my treadmill was waiting. It was time to wrap things up for the day and be ready to start all over again tomorrow.
Now, from this ivory tower, I only see the deserted street. No cars, or people, or kids, or dogs, or joggers. I don't know what time it is. Minutes just blend together and overlap in no particular pattern. I miss normal, and something inside of me whispers, "Normal is gone forever."
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