I've had a lot of epiphanies during this self-quarantine journey. I am rediscovering what is really important and what just doesn't really matter. I am rediscovering some things I really enjoy doing, and enjoying not having to do some things I really don't enjoy. That said, I have surprised myself with the revelation that people's opinions still mean more to me than I ever realized. I have liked to think that the only really important opinion is God's, and if He is pleased, it doesn't really matter what anyone else in the whole world thinks. Right? I know that is true. I believe it is true.
However, there is this very human side of us that values what our friends and family think about us and the things we do. Publishing The Counselor's Daughter has been very revealing to me. I see how very much I am lifted up by the positive opinions of others, and how fragile I am when someone I really love or respect is giving off negative vibes. Why wouldn't everyone be encouraging, even if this publishing thing turns out to be a gigantic failure? I don't know the answer to that. I am amazed, though, at who has reacted positively and who has reacted negatively. People don't always fall into the neat little categories we have in mind.
Well, what is my epiphany from all of this? I need to be more sensitive to everyone around me. I feel like a pretty insignificant person in the scheme of life, and I haven't ever thought of my opinions as being particularly valuable. However, I wonder now if there is someone out there who values my opinion and is just waiting for a little encouragement from me? Do I take the time to notice and respond in a positive, loving way? Do I avoid being negative, even when warranted? Am I a Barnabas or a Pharisee? A little of both, I think. I have something new to work on.
Comments